If you hear a voice within you saying, ‘You are not a painter,’ then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced. — Vincent Van Gogh
I just love the above quote and it helped me stay positive through dark times when I was binge eating. You know the cycle: Feel bad about yourself, binge eat, feel ashamed after bingeing, feel alone, binge some more, feel awful about yourself, and on and on. The cycle never ends.
Obviously, when you binge, you don’t feel great about yourself. Your self-esteem is low and you are trying to fill a void or trying to escape from real life by bingeing. After you binge, you wonder to yourself why you just did that. Why you don’t have control. Why you can’t just get it together and stop bingeing… So you make a promise that “tomorrow” you will stop bingeing. The infamous “tomorrow” always sounds better to stop than at that very moment in time.
But “tomorrow” comes and goes and nothing changes. So what happens then? You feel worthless, undeserving of having a healthy relationship of food, and helpless to the binge eating control that is stronger than you feel. You almost succumb that binge eating will always be in your life. Then you feel depressed just thinking about that.
The negative self-talk sets in some more and that little voice inside your head goes strong firing off one bad statement after another. “You aren’t good enough to not binge.” “Just accept that this is how your life will always be.” “You don’t deserve to be free of binge eating.” “You are so weak that you can’t beat this.”
And on and on.
We all have voices in our heads that talk to us on an almost constant basis. Our voices give us messages continually, and what they say to us affects us.
– Juliene Berk
Believe me, I know how tough this is. I know how weak you feel just thinking about not bingeing. It’s a crazy feeling. On one hand, you, of course, do not want to binge, but on the only hand, it’s what you know. All you know even, perhaps. It’s somewhat safe to you, even though that sounds absurd and you know that deep down.
I get it. I’ve been there.
But what you have to start doing, if you want to stop binge eating, is to practice positive self-talk. You have to silence that little voice in your head when it starts telling you that you aren’t good enough. Yes, you are. Remember that. You are good enough to beat binge eating disorder. We all have the ability in us to conquer this awful eating disorder; it just takes some time.
It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not.
– Author Unknown
And we just have to take it step-by-step and day-by-day. Honestly. Focus this next week on practicing positive self-talk. Tell yourself that you are worth it. Pay yourself a compliment instead of noticing your flaws. Buy yourself some flowers and watch your mood improve.
I know this is easier said than done, but it can be done. You just have to try and put in an effort. You can do it. When you notice yourself start to get negative, counter that with a positive.
Yesterday, while I was at Target, I tried on a bikini in the dressing room. Immediately when I saw myself in the mirror, I started thinking, “I wish my stomach didn’t have that little pooch from having a baby.” “I wish my stomach was more toned.” “I’m so pale.”
And then I stopped. What in the world was I doing?
So I looked at my little mommy pooch and realized that pooch or not, I have an amazing little boy that gave me that pooch and I’m okay with that. Sure, I wish I had a 6-pack, but I think I’m doing pretty damn well considering where I’ve been. I’ve come far. I’ve lost a ton of weight and kept it off for years now. And as for the paleness, it’s nothing that a little self-tanner can’t help.
So I let myself off the hook. I was positive and felt better. You can do this too, I promise. Give it a try and see how your week goes!
Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
Remember, there is only one of you. We only have one life. You owe it to yourself to try to make it the best life ever. You owe it to your children. You owe it to your husband, wife, or significant other. But again, most importantly, you owe it to yourself. You are amazing and life can be amazing. Go after all of the things you want!